At school the next morning, before the first class began, I was walking down the hall when I saw Madison at her locker, putting her coat inside. I stopped and said, “Hi.”
She turned, breaking into a smile when she saw who it was. “Hey! Hi, Julie!”
“Um, so, how are you doing?” I asked. I felt a little foolish, since I had no idea what to say. I hadn’t rehearsed a conversation as I had for our previous meeting.
“Good, good,” she nodded, still smiling. She shut her locker and picked up her backpack. “I had a really great weekend. How about you?”
“Yeah, definitely. It was…”
I thought about my weekend, about my sexy bath with Kate and the naughty fun we’d had before the bath, and about trying to surprise our mother and all the hot things we’d done with her in her bed that night, but of course I couldn’t tell Madison about any of that.
So, I said, “I, uh, I went babysitting for the first time.”
“Oh, really?”
We started down the hall together. We were actually heading in the wrong direction for me, but I didn’t say anything. I liked walking with her.
“How did it go?” she asked.
“It went fine, I guess. Pretty boring, though.”
“Yeah, I know, it can be. But guess what I did? You’ll never guess.”
“What?” I looked up at her.
Madison was much taller than me. She seemed so much older, so much more grownup than I was. And she was so pretty too. I noticed then that she was wearing a lot of makeup, more than I remembered her wearing before.
“Well,” she said, “I met this really cute guy, Brad, a few weeks ago, at a party at my cousin’s house. He called me up on Saturday, and he asked if he could come over. So he did, and he met my parents. And then later they let him take me out to a movie. Brad’s 16, he’s got his own car and everything. I — wait, this is me. Here’s my class. I’ll talk to you later, okay?”
“Okay.”
She spotted one of her friends inside the room and rushed over to her. “Guess what I did this weekend? You’ll never guess!”
I turned away and started walking back up the hall in the other direction, a skinny seventh-grader who would never in a million years be allowed to go on a date with a high school boy. And who would never want to either, of course.
* * *
Elaine Gallagher called our house Wednesday afternoon, asking if I could babysit for her again on Saturday night. I said I would. My mom dropped me off at 6:45, this time not going up to the door with me, just waiting in the car. When Elaine opened the front door, my mother smiled and waved, then drove away.
Fifteen minutes later, Elaine was gone and I was stuck in the house with her two brats for the next four or five hours. Okay, they weren’t really brats, they were perfectly fine little kids. But I guess I’m not cut out to be a babysitter. I can do everything I’m supposed to do, it’s just that it seems so dull to me.
Maybe that’s why I went snooping that night. The first time I was there I’d been tempted to snoop but had mostly managed to restrain myself. This time, after getting Justin and Britney in bed at 8:00 and then flipping through the TV channels for half an hour, finding nothing at all I wanted to watch, I couldn’t resist the urge.
I turned off the TV and went first to the kitchen to see if there was anything that looked good in the fridge. There wasn’t. I checked the jar on the top shelf of the cupboard and found it was still well stocked with candy bars, but decided to wait until later if I was going to have one at all. Right now I was interested in finding something else. Exactly what, though, I wasn’t sure.
Going down the hall, I looked in the den, which was really more of a junk room. Some old pieces of furniture, exercise equipment that obviously hadn’t been used in a while, a few books, and a lot of dust. Elaine wasn’t very scrupulous about keeping things clean.
That was all there was downstairs: the kitchen, the dining room (mostly empty), the den, the family room, and the garage. I’d searched the family room pretty thoroughly the last time I was there, so now my only choice was to head upstairs.
I’d been up there already, of course, but only in the bathroom and in the kids’ bedroom. There were two other rooms waiting for me. One of them was a combination playroom and sewing room, which, I discovered, was mostly a mess and very dusty. The closet in that room was stuffed full of old clothes and old toys. Nothing interesting at all.
One room left. Elaine’s bedroom. I paused in front of her door. My heart was pounding. Was it wrong for me to be doing this?
Well, yes, of course it was wrong. But that didn’t stop me. Sweet reliable Julie, the girl who never ever does anything bad, was breaking all the rules tonight. It felt good being the bad girl for once — even if no one else knew but me.
I opened her bedroom door and stepped inside. Turning on the light, I waited for a minute, making sure the house was completely quiet, that the kids were still fast asleep. And then I started snooping.
I looked in her chest of drawers. I found some nice lingerie there, a lot of it, in fact. She had quite a collection. I admired some of her things, taking them out and wondering what it would be like to wear them. Then I recalled trying on the sexy outfits that night at Victoria’s Secret with my mom and Tracy and Melissa, and smiled to myself about the happy memory. I did my best to put everything back in the drawers the way I’d found it.
Next I looked in her closet but found only clothes, tons of clothes, including several dozen pairs of shoes. She had plenty of things to wear, although I didn’t think too much of her taste.
I checked the little table by her bedside, which had a small drawer. Nothing good in there.
Only one more place to look. On the wall opposite the bed was a desk with a TV on top of it, along with a DVD player. Opening the top drawer, I found a few things that looked like old bills, and that was pretty much it. The other drawer, the large file drawer, was locked. Shit! That was probably where the best stuff was.
I almost gave up and left the room at that point. But then I decided to look once more in the other drawer, just in case I might find a key. And inside a small brown envelope, there it was.
With trembling hands, I fit the key into the lock on the file drawer and turned it. I began sliding the drawer out. Then I stopped.
What would I do if Elaine came home right now? Would I have time to carefully lock everything up again, return the key to the envelope, leave the room exactly as I’d found it, turn off the bedroom light and then get back downstairs without being discovered? Without being exposed as the criminal suspect I plainly was?
Taking a deep breath, I tracked in my mind the steps I would have to take to conceal what I’d done. I could do it all, I decided. I was safe. And besides, it was still only around 9:00 o’clock. She wouldn’t be home for hours yet. No problem.
Now, let’s see what’s in this drawer… aha!
There was a box inside, and in the box were at least thirty or forty DVDs — porn DVDs — and they were all lesbian!!!
Actually, they weren’t all lesbian. I found a few that seemed to be girls by themselves, apparently masturbating. But all the rest showed pictures of two girls together, or even three or four girls together. I examined one DVD after another, studying the incredibly explicit pictures and lurid descriptions. Not one of them showed a man anywhere.
Wow, what did this mean? Was Elaine a lesbian? Why did she go on dates with men, then? I couldn’t figure that out. Unless maybe she wasn’t really going out with men at all. Maybe that was just what she told me. Maybe she was really going to clubs like the ones my mom went to, and maybe… was it possible my mom might run into her at one of those clubs some night? What would happen then?
My mind raced with the possibilities.
There was another box in the drawer, a smaller one. Inside that box was… something… wrapped in a washcloth, something cylindrical, shaped like… oh my god, could it be? At one end of the thing, the flat end, I found a switch. Did I dare turn it on?
No, I didn’t dare. I had no idea what it would do. It might make a loud noise, start beeping or something, who knows.
I wrapped the thing up in the washcloth and put it back in the box the way I’d found it, then returned the box to the drawer. I assumed what I had found was a vibrator or a dildo or something. I’d heard kids talk about stuff like that, and some of the pictures on the DVD covers showed girls using things that appeared to be similar, but I had never seen one before in real life. What a night of discovery this was turning out to be!
I went back to sorting through the DVDs. There were so many, and they were so exciting. Maybe I should put one in the DVD player and watch it!
No, that would be too risky. I might accidentally wake up the kids, and if they found me like that it could be a disaster. And even if the kids didn’t wake up, if I got involved in what I was watching and I didn’t hear Elaine come home and she discovered me… and then that made me wonder what would happen if she ever did catch me looking at her lesbian DVDs.
Would she be angry? Probably. But maybe she wouldn’t. Maybe she would be pleased. Maybe she would want to try some of the things with me that I saw in the pictures on the covers. Would I want her to do that? I wasn’t sure. I didn’t actually think she was very attractive, not at all in fact. On the other hand, I definitely did want to have sex with a woman someday, so maybe… or maybe not.
For now, I decided, I needed to put these things away and go downstairs and watch TV or something. I really didn’t want to get caught redhanded that way, at least not until I’d thought a lot more about all the pros and cons.
As I placed the DVDs back inside their box (having been very careful to keep them in order as I looked through them), I had another felonious impulse.
Maybe I should take one. Just one. Take it with me and put it in my backpack and steal it. Then some night at home when Mommy was out, Kate and I could watch it together.
I decided against that too. Not only was it stupid — what if the DVD I took just happened to be Elaine’s favorite one and she noticed it right away and called my mom? — not only was it stupid, but it was just plain wrong too. Snooping was one thing. Stealing was clearly another. I returned the larger box to the drawer, locked it up, replaced the key in the small brown envelope, and put the envelope back exactly where I’d found it. I hoped.
After checking around to make sure there were no obvious traces of my breaking and entering, I turned off the bedroom light and closed the door. I looked in on the kids, who were snoozing away, and went back down to the family room for a long night of boredom.
I sat in front of the TV for a while, remote in hand, but again could find nothing on I really wanted to watch. At 10:00, I called my mom and reported in, but of course I didn’t tell her anything about my snooping.
Shortly after I hung up the phone, though, I began to reconsider. Maybe I should say something to my mother about the porn I found. After all, she always told me I could talk to her about anything, right? Hm, I would have to think about that some more…
The hours went slowly by. At 11:00, I finally turned off the TV for good. I looked through some of Elaine’s stupid magazines, which killed a few minutes, then dug into my backpack, pulled out a mystery novel I was reading, and settled down with that. About midnight, I climbed up on a chair in the kitchen, took a Milky Way bar from the jar and ate it, without even feeling very guilty this time.
Elaine got home at 12:45. Apparently she’d had a more enjoyable evening than the previous time, because she was in a much better mood. Or maybe she was just drunk. Anyway, she was all laughs and pretty loud too. I was afraid she might wake the kids, but then they were her kids, so what did I care? I called my mom and she came to pick me up. Elaine gave me $60. Sweet!
I figured it was too late to start a serious conversation about anything that night, so when we got home, I just kissed my mother goodnight and went to my room. Before I fell asleep, though, I had a pleasant time remembering some of the pictures of the girls on the DVD covers kissing and touching each other, putting their fingers and tongues in everywhere. After a nice hot orgasm, I fell asleep.
* * *
The next day, which was Sunday, I kept looking for opportunities to talk with my mom about what I’d found the night before. But she was always with either Molly or Kate and so I never got the chance.
Instead, I waited until everyone was down for the night, and then knocked on her door. It was about 10:15.
“Mom?”
“Come in, sweetie.” She was sitting up in bed, wearing a red babydoll nightgown, totally sheer. It was one I hadn’t seen before. I liked it immediately.
“Hi, um, is it okay if I talk to you about something?”
“Of course it is.” She took off her reading glasses, put down the book she was holding, and held her arms out to me. I went to the bed and got a nice hug and kiss from her.
For the occasion, for this special conversation, I’d decided to put on something different from my usual boxers and t-shirt. I was in a light pink camisole, very thin, almost transparent. I’d bought it the previous weekend, using money I’d earned in my first babysitting job (which seemed appropriate). I was also wearing my briefest, sexiest pair of hipster panties. They were bright red and went quite nicely with my mom’s nightie, I realized.
I’d hoped the outfit might make me look a little bit like the hot girls I’d seen in the pictures on those DVDs. My mother apparently approved. After she kissed me, she held me away from her a moment and said, “Well, don’t you look tantalizing! My little girl is definitely growing up. And very nicely too.”
Although this was exactly the reaction I’d wanted, I found myself blushing. Silly me. “Oh, uh, thanks, Mom,” I stammered.
I settled in next to her. Her arm was around my shoulder, pulling me close.
“So, what did you want to talk about, sweetie?”
“Well, um, it’s kind of embarrassing…”
“But you know you can -”
“always talk to me about anything,” we recited in unison, and then had a good laugh.
“Well, you know you can,” she emphasized.
“I know,” I looked at her, smiling, “and I’m really glad I can, Mom. I mean that, I really am.”
She kissed me on the lips. “Good. Me too. Now tell me what’s on your mind.”
“So, um, it’s about when I was babysitting last night at, well, at Ms. Gallagher’s — only she wants me to call her Elaine instead — that’s okay, isn’t it?”
“Sure, of course it’s fine, if that’s what she wants.”
“All right. Um, anyway, after I put the kids to bed, it was only about 8:00 o’clock and I was already bored. There’s nothing to do over there. No video games or movie channels or anything. I mean, I had a book with me, but, um… I was really bored, and then I did a bad thing.”
“What did you do?”
“Well, I decided to… to sort of look around, to see if I could find anything interesting.”
“What do you mean by interesting?”
“Oh, I don’t know. Just, like, something different, anything.”
“Okay.”
“Um, and so, I looked around, but it was just the usual stuff people have. Except a lot of it was sort of junky and dirty. I mean, she doesn’t keep her house very clean.”
“Okay. And?”
“Um, well, so I finally decided to look in her bedroom, in Elaine’s bedroom?”
“Yes?”
“And I found something in there that I wanted to talk with you about.”
“You found this in Elaine’s bedroom?”
“Uh-huh.”
“You were snooping in there?”
“Yeah, I… I’m sorry, Mommy, it’s just, I was so bored, and… I didn’t mean to do anything wrong, but… well, I mean I know it was wrong, and I knew it was wrong then but I did it anyway, and” — by then I was sobbing — “I’m sorry, Mommy, I know it was wrong.”
My mother let me cry for a little while.
“I’m sorry, Mommy, I won’t do it again, I promise I won’t.”
Finally she hugged me. “Hush now, it’s okay, we all do things that are wrong sometimes. Even you.”
“I’m sorry, Mommy,” I sobbed.
“I know you are, darling, I know.” She kissed my forehead. “Come on, now, you don’t have to cry. I’m not mad at you.”
“You’re not?”
“No, darling, I’m not mad at you.” She kissed my cheeks, kissing my tears.
I sniffled and tried to regain my composure. “I promise I won’t do it again.” I wiped my nose with my arm.
“I know you won’t.” My mother reached over to the table by her bed and grabbed a tissue from a box. “Here, baby girl, blow your nose. It’s okay.”
After blowing my nose a couple of times, using another tissue, and then another, I said, “I’m sorry, Mommy.” I almost started crying again.
“There, there now, that’s enough tears. And I know you’re sorry, you don’t have to keep saying it. Okay?”
I sniffed and blew my nose one more time. “Okay.”
“All done crying now?”
I tried to smile. “I think so.”
“Okay, good.” She kissed me on the lips. “Let’s just take a minute now, and settle down. Take a big deep breath. That’s good. Now take another.”
I did as she asked, twice.
“That’s my good girl. Feeling better now?”
“Yeah.” This time my smile was more genuine.
“All right,” she said, “so it seems to me that there are two things going on here. First, you were snooping, and obviously you feel bad about that. Fine, we’ll talk about that. And second, there was something you found in, uh, in Elaine’s bedroom. Something you’ve been thinking about a lot, because otherwise you wouldn’t be in here talking to me about this. Am I right?”
Now I really smiled. “Uh-huh. Exactly right.”
“Okay, so, first things first. You told me were snooping, and that you know that was wrong. You knew it was wrong at the time, but you did it anyway. Correct?”
I nodded, feeling on the verge of tears again.
“All right, now, don’t start crying again. I know you feel bad about it, and you should feel bad. I’m glad you do. But Julie, everyone does bad things. Everyone. Even you. That doesn’t make them right, but just because we sometimes do bad things, that doesn’t make us bad people. Do you see?”
“Um, I think so.” Her logic was compelling. I felt a little less like crying now, and a lot more like thinking.
“You were wrong, that is, you did the wrong thing, and we can talk about why it was wrong. Let’s do that first, okay?”
I glanced at the clock and saw that it was past 10:30. It was a school night, and I should be in bed by now, but my mom was willing to have this conversation with me anyway. I loved her so much.
“Now, honey, why do you think it was wrong to be snooping?”
“Well, um, because… I was violating her privacy?”
My mother nodded. “That’s right. Any other reasons?”
I thought about it. I took another very deep breath and let it out. “Because, because she trusted me. Um, because she hired me to do a job, and, and when I was, when I was snooping, I wasn’t doing my job.”
“Very good.” She squeezed my shoulder. “I’m impressed. That’s a very mature attitude for a 12-year-old.”
“Thanks, I guess,” I smiled.
“I understand that you’re sorry, and you understand why it was wrong. I’m not going to punish you for it. I don’t think that’s necessary. Okay?”
“Okay.”
“But before we go on to the second part, we should talk a little more about snooping. You know, Julie, it may be hard to believe, but I was a little girl too at one time. I was 12 years old once, way back in the Dark Ages, and I did some babysitting myself.”
She smiled at me, then continued. “I know how boring it can be, and I understand that the temptation to look around can be almost irresistible. I did it too, more than once.”
“You did?”
“Uh-huh, and I think most babysitters probably do. Or at least a lot of them do. It’s understandable, it’s basically human nature. That doesn’t make it right, but it also means it’s not a very terrible crime. You just showed yourself to be human, that’s all.”
Another smile, and this time a kiss on the lips.
“But as you said, there are reasons why it’s wrong, and if you are mature enough to see those, then you may also be mature enough to resist the temptation, most of the time anyway.”
At this point I couldn’t help myself. I knew she wasn’t finished talking, but I wanted to give her a hug, a big one. And so I did. I wrapped my arms around her, squeezing her tightly. “Thank you, Mommy. Thank you for explaining everything.”
“You’re welcome, darling.”
“But, um, I know you’re not done,” I said as I released her from the hug. “There was a part two, right?”
“Yes,” she chuckled, “part two coming up right after this commercial message.”
She put her mouth on mine and kissed me deeply, her lips parting, her tongue seeking mine. We kissed wetly and warmly for a minute or so. By the time we were done I was panting, my pussy aflame.
“Now then,” my mother smiled, her eyes hooded seductively, “shall we talk about part two?”
I took a deep breath. “Okay.”
“Tell me what you found in her bedroom.”
Continue on to Chapter 44
Another nice chapter, I love the storyline in the book. Each chapter opens up another subject of learning for Julie. So many things to come that keeps me reading on!