By JetBoy
For the purpose of this story, my name is Susan Burroughs. In fact, all the names in this text have been changed. I am sixty-two years old and live in Fremont. California, with my partner Elaine (again, not her actual name).
I have been a lesbian for my entire adult life, and for nearly all of my teenage years as well. The story you are about to read is compiled from the diary I kept from my thirteenth birthday onward; it tells of how I first became a lover of women.
I’ve removed the portions of my diary entries that have nothing to do with the main plot line — what I ate for lunch that day, TV shows I watched, records I bought, the everyday drama of junior high school. For awhile, I was fairly excessive about documenting my day-to-day life, and much of it will have little to no interest to someone who wasn’t there at the time.
On the other hand, after considerable thought on the matter, I’ve chosen to leave in the various errors I made in spelling, grammar and sentence construction, and hope that you will not find them too much of a distraction. I was only thirteen, after all!
I’ve never shared these pages with anyone but a few of my lovers. Many thanks to Cheryl, Naughty Mommy, and JetBoy for assisting me in finally making them public.
*****
Tuesday 4th January, 1966
Hello, new diary! First, I guess I should write a little about me. My name is Susie Burroughs, and I live in Spencer, Nebraska with my mommy and daddy, no brothers or sisters. I’ve got brown eyes and real long blond hair. I’m in seventh grade. I love horses, roller skating, pizza (YUM!) comic books and Bugs Bunny cartoons.
But most important of all, I’m officialy 13 today. Yay!!
It was a really great day. We had cake with ice cream on top after supper. Mommy got me the Herman’s Hermits album I wanted, some books and a pretty new blue dress. Daddy gave me a brand new bike, with a wicker basket and a little horn and everything! Grandma sent a card with money inside. I want to use some of it to buy these neat stickers I saw at the Hobby Hut to put on my new bike.
But the very best part was when Aunt Evie came by! She just got back from her trip to France. Mommy didnt tell me she was home just so she could suprise me for my birthday. I felt so happy to see her that I was jumping all around the living room! She brought me a pretty sweater from Paris.
We all had a real good time, and I got to stay up a hour later which I get to do EVERY night now, cause Daddy promised I could when I turned 13.
Before she left Aunt Evie came to my room. I was in bed and about to turn out the light, and she knocked on the door to say that she had another present for me. It was this diary, which has a lock on the front. She told me I should write all my sexy girl things in it. When she said that, she tickled me under my arms a little bit and made me giggle.
I hoped Aunt Evie would tell me more about sexy girl things cause I don’t know a lot about them. But she didnt, she just smiled at me and gave me a big hug and said Good night, birthday girl.
I’m a little afraid to ask Mommy what Aunt Evie means. I know some stuff about sex, but there is lots that I dont understand.
*****
Thursday 6th January, 1966
After I finished my shower I spent some time in the bathroom looking at myself. I opened my legs real wide and looked at my pussy. That’s what the girls at school call it when they’re talking about sex stuff. I dont look so much like a little girl any more cause I grew some hair down there. It felt kind of funny touching there while I looked at everything. I had to wipe myself when I was done.
Mommy looked at me sort of strange when I came out. I felt my face get hot, and I hurried fast to my room to get ready for school.
Maybe after I finish writing this, I can look at myself down there again. There are things I still want to find out.
*****
Saturday 8th January, 1966
Daddy went off to play golf, and Mommy took me out to eat lunch at the counter of Woolworths. I got a chicken salad sandwich, and Jello with whip cream on top.
Then we went to this little shop downtown. It was a nice store that just sold things for girls like party dresses, jumpers and pretty panties and stuff.
The owner was this woman with a nice smile named Miss Decker. She said this would be a private fitting, so she had to close the store. I guess it was OK, cause no one else was there any how. She had this cute sign that said SORRY WERE CLOSED, with a picture of a man with a sad face, which she put in the window, then she locked the door. It made me feel kind of special, the whole store being closed just for me!
Miss Decker took us to a room in the back and gave me a Coke to drink while she talked to Mommy. Then she brought out these real pretty bras with matching panties. Miss Decker helped me take my top off so she could measure me. I was so excited to be getting my first bra!
The measureing tape was cold, and it made the nipples on my titties feel tickly and stand out. Miss Decker just laughed and said that was natural. She put her hand over them one at a time, and I giggled cause it made them tingle.
I wasnt sure if I should let this lady touch me there. But Mommy was watching and smiling at us, so I guess it was all right. It sure made me feel nice.
Then Miss Decker suprised me. She asked if I would like for Mommy to touch me there!
I looked over at Mommy, not sure what she would say. But she just smiled, so I said OK.
I felt REALLY funny, going over to Mommy without my top on and just standing there, but then she ran her warm hands over my titties and it felt wonderful. Then she gave me a kiss and told me I was a good girl and she loved me.
The new underwear we picked out was very nice. Mommy wanted to see it on me, and I was shy about taking all my clothes off in front of her and Miss Decker. But I didnt want to act like a little kid, so I took off everything.
They both said I looked so pretty that I didn’t feel so shy any more. I started to like showing off all the different panties they gave me to try, standing there while they smiled and clapped.
Mommy bought me three bras and panties that match. Then she promised me we can go back for more next week. I gave Mommy a big hug for being so nice and she kissed me, right on the mouth! Not a quick little kiss like she always gives me. This time it lasted much longer and her mouth was all soft and warm. She never did that before. It made me feel strange but in a nice way.
When she finaly let me go Mommy gave me the prettiest smile as I stood there with my heart beating fast. She reached out and touched my cheek and whispered, Sweet Susie. Something about the way she said that made me all shivery inside.
Then Mommy laughed and took my hand, and we said goodbye to Miss Decker and left for home.
It was a intresting day, with lots of new exciting things that happened. Being 13 is even better than I imagined it would be!
*****
Monday 11th January, 1966
When we changed for gym class, Claire noticed my new underthings and told me how pretty they were, and how she wished hers were nice as mine. Claire kept touching me while she looked, she even ran her hands over my panties! Wow did that ever feel funny, but I liked it a lot.
Then she pulled her dress up and showed me her panties, too! So I felt her too, the same way, and she just smiled at me. But I was afraid someone would see us, so I only touched her a little bit.
Later before school finished, Claire came over and asked if I would like to go to her house after school some time next week. I said I would love to. So exciting!
*****
Thursday 13th January, 1966
Aunt Evie came over for a suprise visit. I was in my room doing my homework when she suddenly was at the door and asked if she could come in.
She looked around at my Barbie collection and told me she collected teddy bears when she was little. I told her that I never played with my Barbies any more. Really I do sometimes, but only by myself so no one will know.
She asked if I was writing in my new diary too, and I guess my face went red when I told her I was, cause she giggled and bet me it was all lots of secret naughty things. I pretended it wasnt, but then she was tickling me to get me to say it was. I was laughing hard as her fingers made me twist around on the bed.
I was out of breath when she suddenly stopped. Mommy was at the door, she came to tell us dinner was ready and she smiled at me in kind of a funny way before she turned to leave. I felt my face get warm when I saw my skirt was up and you could see my panties. Then Aunt Evie hugged me close and gave me a squeeze before she got up to go downstairs.
Later that night Mommy came in as I am getting ready for bed. She asked if I mind that Aunt Evie was tickling me. I told her I didnt, how it was just us having fun. Mommy smiled and kissed me on the mouth again all soft and nice, like she did the other day.
It felt kind of strange, but I loved it. I wish she kissed me that way ALL the time.
*****
Saturday 15th January, 1966
I woke early this morning and just lay in bed looking at my Barbie dolls, up on the shelf. It made me think of Aunt Evie and when she tickled me, and Mommy looking at my panties when my dress was up, and the way she kissed me later. It made me feel sort of funny down between my legs. I was all tingly and warm.
I wanted more of that feeling. So, I put my hand inside my panties and touched where it tingled the most. It felt good, all sort of hot and shaky inside. I stopped though cause I was all wet down there, and I thought maybe it was my period. I jumped up quick to look, pulling my panties down and moving my legs open to see.
It wasnt blood. But still, I was all wet between my legs. Like I was the other day only this time there was more of it. Lots more.
I was all curious now, so instead of pulling up my panties I sat on the bed with them down to my knees and I touched myself again. Wow, it felt REALLY good this time!
Then I heard Mommy come down the hall to my room. I was scared of getting caught , so I pulled up my panties fast as I could, and pushed my skirt down right before she came in.
She must have seen something in my face when she opened the door, cause she looked serious all of a sudden. She closed the door, and sat down beside me to ask what was wrong.
It was so stupid of me, but I just couldnt help myself. I started to cry like a little kid. I tried to explain to Mommy what I was doing, how I was touching myself and it made me feel strange but nice. I was so afraid she would be mad at me!
Then I was sitting on Mommy’s lap against the front of her nightie, and she stroked my hair and rocked me. Her titties felt like a nice warm pillow, and I was thinking about what they looked like under her clothes. I guess that I saw them when she gave me milk after I was born. But that was a long time ago and I was too little to remember.
Mommy lifted my chin to look into her face and she smiled at me, calling me her precious baby, and she just laughed when I frowned at her. I hate being called a baby, and she knows it!
She held my face in her hands and kissed me that soft and slow way I like so much. Only this time I felt her tongue go into my mouth! Wow, was THAT different! I felt something like a bolt of lightning go through my belly, and it made my body give a little shake, but I held on to Mommy and let her kiss me more. Then she sat back and smiled. All I could do was stare at her, and my heart beat so loud I think I could hear it.
She put her hand on my cheek and asked me to show her how I touched myself. Her voice was all soft and low, and something about how she said that made me feel all funny. I didnt feel scared at all, but I knew some how when I looked in Mommy’s eyes that I didnt need to be.
Mommy watched as I put a hand in my panties to touch my pussy again, like before she came in my room. Then she stopped me and asked if I would take off my underpants for her, so she could really see me doing it.
I felt SO funny as I stood and pulled my panties off. Mommy helped me sit back against the headboard, then got me to open my legs wide so she could see everything. Then she looked at me while I touched myself.
This time, it was even better than before. I could hardly breathe and I felt a tingle all over. My pussy was so warm and wet!
Something inside told me to go faster and harder. I was feeling all dizzy and breathing fast. My body felt like it was moving to grab hold of a thing I couldnt reach, but if I tried hard, I could catch it.
I pushed my fingers between my legs, and suddenly it was like something went BANG inside of me. I couldnt sit still, and shook like I was cold as I rubbed myself. I wasnt cold, though, I felt hot all over! It felt better than anything I’ve ever done for a little bit, then it kind of went away. Then I was staring down at my hand, still lying on my pussy. I was breathing fast, just like when I run.
Mommy was there holding me close. She said I was her little darling, her grown up girl, smiling at me and kissing me so soft, the way I liked. I wished she would put her tongue in my mouth again, but I was too shy to say.
Did I do good? I asked, wanting to lie in her arms all day long.
Oh, your the best! she told me with a little laugh.
She cuddled me for a little longer, then stood up and told me to go wash up and come down for breakfast, just like she did every morning. It was like she had turned back into my old Mommy again. I’m not sure what that means exactly, but that was how I felt.
A little while ago, just before I got ready for bed, I snuck up to my room while Mommy and Daddy watched TV and closed the door, then took off all my clothes and lay down. I left the lights on to see everything. I started to touch myself again, moving my fingers up and down my pussy, letting the good feelings grow and grow.
There were different places to touch down there, and they all felt great in some way. I even put a finger INSIDE of me a little bit, and that was good too! I also liked moving the tip of my finger around where the inside of my pussy started, that made my head feel like it was spinning fast.
But the best best BEST of all was this little bump at the top of my pussy that when I touched it, the feelings got really huge in me, like when I let Mommy see me do it this morning. So I rubbed there, and after a little while everything began to get all fast again.
Then that explosion thing came, only it didnt suprise me like before. I could almost SEE it get closer and closer until it was grabbing me, and I was breathing hard and shaking all over. It was even better this time!
I lay quiet for awhile, feeling my heart go fast, then slow down until it was like always. Then I got up to wash my hands and put on my nightie and brush my teeth.
Now I’m sitting in bed and writing this. It’s past my bedtime so I have to stop here and turn out the light before Mommy or Daddy comes up to see why I’m not asleep.
Continue on to Chapter 2